Friday, August 5, 2011

Feedback on my introductory paragraph?

Things had changed around town; from the hierarchy of the school ground teens to the all-in late-night piss-ups down by the old factory near Moorcroft woods, and Matthew was the latest manipulator elected to high standings within the group. God knows he had it coming. A compulsive of his nature struck the core doctrine of the group and within a matter of two June weeks, blessed in sun; he was at number one on the de facto standings board to which the wolves of Moorcroft all offered worship so loyally.

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